Beijing trip 2 (aka Adventure in Peking)

As I set out on my second trip to Beijing, I called myself a seasoned 'international' traveler. Ok, I haven't traveled that much, but enough times to have mastered the drill and not get worked up. It was going to be a short trip anyway and was looking forward to get back more than ever.

The only weekend I was there started of with my visiting the Lama temple, a beautiful monastery. Sunday evening after a day's shopping or rather window shopping I took the usual subway back home parted ways with my friends who stayed in another hotel. It was dark and very very cold, just the kind of day for me to forget my jacket. I hugged myself tight and started to walk the short distance to my hotel. As I neared I could hear footsteps match mine and someone closing in. I've felt this way many times before, even in Bangalore, this thing about being a woman makes you suspicious all the time. I didn't have the courage to look back though, I just wanted to get back as early as I could. I relaxed entering the hotel premises but the footsteps were only getting closer, perhaps it was another guest eager to avoid the cold harsh winds. Not stopping, I continued, in the instant that I entered the revolving doors I could feel a man's hand grab my wallet from the bag I was carrying. I turned and saw a look on his face that I'll never forget. By the time I came out of the revolving door again he was gone.

Cash, cards and my beautiful wallet..all gone. Gone! I walked back coolly to my room and blocked all my cards within no time like a pro. This is what experience does to you. This has happened to me 3 times now. Yes THREE. First time in a foreign country though. (first time I just misplaced my wallet, was in college and broke so doesn't count I guess) What would have happened if I had decided to look back. Knowing how close he was to me, he might have done something stupid. Would he have brandished a knife? Or would he have ran? Also, I am out of kickboxing practice, he was a small man but I don't think I could have taken him on.

I told the hotel manager what had happened and I asked them to check the security camera. After long wait they said it hadn't capture anything. I insisted that I see the video. They made several calls to get permissions and allowed me to walk to the control room. Turns out they hadn't made much effort to look for the clip. After much sorting we finally found the tape and everything was caught on camera crystal clear.

Watching the video had a 2 fold effect on me. One I was convinced I wasn't imagining things. The hotel guys repeatedly were telling me that I probably lost it in the subway. I had a look of triumph when I finally found the video but I don't think the Chinese get 'I told you so'.
Second, watching myself on the screen and being robbed spooked me more than I could imagine. All the confidence I had built up vanished. I avoided the subway for the rest of my stay, borrowed money to pay my hotel bill and waited anxiously to return home safely.

Everyone says its not my fault, could have happened to anyone. I blame myself though. I let my guard slip. Was over confident and didn't take the necessary precautions I normally take before every travel. I have this natural tendency to attract disaster (Bridge Jones Syndrome) so should have been more careful. Losing the money didn't matter much. Money comes money goes. What I find very difficult to get over is the queasy feeling in my stomach, combination of guilt, being made a fool of, being gullible. On the plus side, it gave me something to blog about!

15 seconds of fame

So I was on national television for all of 15 seconds and frankly I don't think I made much sense. The question I had to answer was how as a woman I've contributed to the product I'm working on. Say what? I mean, I contribute. I do a good job. And maybe I do better than some other people would have, but how being a woman have I made a difference? Our roles are defined irrespective of gender and purely on skills and talent. Given the nature of my job I think I haven't really done anything special on account of being a woman. However, I believe that having a diverse team is an indication of a healthy team. Men and women are not wired the same, we approach problems differently and I guess it helps to have a mixed group when you are brainstorming or say tackling a problem. A woman's perspective might just come in handy specially so if it is a product you are designing with women consumers in mind.

As to why I got this opportunity, I wasn't the first choice, but the other person happened to be on leave and I volunteered. I'm camera shy and all that but hey I want to be famous too. :P Also funny how I'm usually never the first choice for many such events. Like recently,I got to go on campus placements (something I've always wanted to do) because someone else dropped out. That talk I gave once simply because no one else was qualified enough, the chance to 'garland' few delegates (in this case though I am not sure why I even agreed to do it).... Oh well, I'm not complaining.

China round up

While in China, I obsessed over the title of the post that I would eventually write. Should it be 'From Bangalore to Beijing', you know like 'Chandini chowk to China'. Or should it be called 'Beijing Bites'? All along I made notes on random observations that would go into this post. Back home, the notebook went missing and provided the perfect excuse for not writing at all. Today, I found the book but believe it or not the page in which I made those little notes has vanished. Maybe the perfect post was not meant to be and you will have to make do with these tit-bits that I remember...

* No google, facebook, twitter. The Chinese have their own versions of all these sites which they claim is far better than the original.
* People, people everywhere!
* And they look great. Wonder how they stay so thin and look young. Could it be the tea that they constantly drink?
* Had to face the horrid summer heat. It rained on only one day in all the time I was there and that was on my birthday.
* The traffic and the one hour long journey to work everyday made me feel at home. Even then it is not as chaotic as it is here.
* Communication was a big problem. It was like playing dumb charades everyday.
* This trip reminded me of my Turkey visit for many reasons. The feeling of old meets new, history lingering in every corner, the sense of pride the locals have...but then it is not the same. People are less friendly and guarded.
* There are quite a few Indian restaurants, I even found a Kamats restaurant. But wonder why Indian cuisine hasn't had the kind of influence Chinese has in India.
* Speaking of food, Indian-Chinese beats Chinese-Chinese any day ;)
* I didn't interact much with the locals there, my only source of information was the daily English news paper which I eagerly looked forward to everyday. Other than the daily news they'd write about how men were finding it hard to find women, of parents trying to 'arrange' their kids marriages, how they try to escape the one child policy...all in all very interesting.
* The subway system though crowded is the best way to travel within the city. Cheap, fast and efficient. I cant wait for Metro to take off in Bangalore.

That is all for now..here are some pics. Enjoy.

Chief I'm awesome Officer

I have always envied people with really cool designations. I once almost took up a job because they offered me a position that had an important sounding name though the profile was pretty ordinary. Unfortunately in the last few years I've had to make do with standard (read boring) designations. Not that I have a problem with my current role. I like what I do but on paper it translates to something very ordinary. I find myself searching for words trying to describe my role when people throw at me their oh-I'm-so-good job titles. This one time I chose a fancy name for my business card, it was rejected by someone who didn't even know me citing some obscure reason even though my manager had approved it. I never applied for any ever again. This is also one of the main reasons I never updated my profile at LinkedIn. Every time I tried, that horrible 'title' text box kept staring at me as if it was mocking, 'Really, is that all you are?'

Coming up with a summary or headline is an art in itself where being modest can work against you. I have much to learn, meanwhile I'll live with what I have - code monkey.

Conversations

Them : We have to discuss this. Please let me know if 8:00 pm is a suitable time for you.
me : How about we schedule it in the morning, 10:00 am?
Them : No, I am not free. Please let me know if 8:00 pm is a suitable time for you.
me : Ok then, how about at 9:00 pm?
Them : I have a meeting. Please let me know if 8:00 pm is a suitable time for you.
me : Ok, it is.

----

Them : This is the design we came up with, please let me know if you have any suggestions.
me : Umm, it looks a bit complicated, how about we do this instead?
Them : No, it has already been approved and finalized by higher management and their higher management and by God himself. Nothing you ever say will make any difference, please let me know if you have any suggestions.
me : It looks good.

----

Thank you!

This place has been kind to me so far. I've settled in. I've made friends. I have fun, sometimes I think way too much. I am lucky. Lucky to have a job in these times. Lucky to have found the people around me. Lucky to have gotten this opportunity. I am thankful. I really am.

Stepney

You were introduced to Glue sometime back, now to introduce a new term called the stepney. Does it often happen to you that you have made plans for the weekend with someone and they got canceled at the last minute, thanks to the other party? There is a good chance you might have been his/her stepney. Meaning you were that person's alternate plan and his/her last minute cancellation is an indication is that his/her primary plan has worked. I often end up being people's stepney and am stuck at home sulking most of the time. Its not fun being a stepney. While I myself have an embarrassing record of canceling on people I'd like to believe they were for genuine reasons and I usually let them know in advance that such a thing might/will happen. The extreme opposite of stepney is the kind of person who gets invited everywhere. I know one such person and I envy him so very much. I don't think he has ever initiated anything yet he gets to go on the most awesome trips. I cant exactly point out what it is that he has but some people are just born as main tyres.

In other news, what a start this year has seen! All the enthusiasm and optimism that I could muster at the beginning of the year has now successfully gone down the stinking drain. Anyhoo don't be a stepney, demand for commitment!

Planning a trip and women at work

I hate organizing trips or organizing anything for that matter. This time however I was desperate to travel, so I volunteered. People at work were excited about the idea of going on a holiday, all we needed was a plan. And a location of course. The guys wanted a place that served cheap booze (read goa or pondy), some preferred mountains while some preferred the sea. After much discussion we had come up with probable list of places to visit. Zeroing in on one place was turning out to be a challenge. I started my research, whichever place was most viable would be chosen. After about 2 days of googling, calling up travel agents, hotels and taxi drivers I finally found out a perfect package tour to a place none of us had visited. Planning the whole trip myself was turning out very taxing and this looked perfect. Whats best, even though this wasn't on our list everyone readily agreed. I was ecstatic. Agreeing on a place followed by choosing a date is the hardest thing when you plan a trip with many people. We had successfully managed to do both. It was a good sign, maybe we were going to pull this one off after all (I have a high failure rate when it comes to going on trips, don't blame me for making a big deal out of this). After the initial inquiry mail I got a reply from the organizers that kids below 11 weren't allowed. My friend who has a 3 year old son (who btw is very cute calls me chechi) was distraught. She asked me to choose another place instead. I wasn't willing to let go and tried my best to suggest alternatives. Maybe her husband could take care of him for the weekend? Maybe she could bring him along but stay away from the adventure activities? When she wouldn't budge I hinted that she should drop out instead of all of us canceling. When she didn't get the hint I gave her an option, I asked her to do all the hard work, come up with an alternate place, make the arrangements and convince others, if she managed to that I'd have no problems else she'd have to back out. It was an impossible task she gave up almost as soon as she started.

Compare the planning of the trip to a project, my friend a team member, I was being the mean old insensitive manager! Just because she had a family (she was the only one married in the group) I was giving her a tough time, hadn't paid attention to her needs and was asking her to step down from the project. All these years I have been bitching about my male bosses and how selfish they can get, how women get a raw deal and how it is doubly tough for women to survive in this industry thanks to bosses like them. Am I then a hypocrite?

Maybe the comparison is not fair. My friend was being unrealistic and I knew it. At one time she even mentioned about bringing along her in-laws. She was going to ruin it for everyone and it would have been a complete failure of the project...I mean the trip. I'd have to be the one to take the blame. Her being a woman or her being married had nothing to do with it. It was a tough decision but I had to act in the interest of everyone. As for the mean old managers who think married women don't make good employees, they can go to hell. I am going to plan another trip sometime next month that everyone can make it to, not because a good manager would do so, because a good friend would do so.

On being a loser

Early this year I entered a poetry competition at work. I am no writer and certainly not a poet but I gave it a shot anyway. I figured that I probably had a small chance of winning because I was competing against my colleagues, how many software engineers wrote poetry anyway? I didn't win. But I wouldn't settle for it. They had only announced the winners, I wrote to the people who organized it to publish the winning poems so that everyone could appreciate it. Real reason was I wanted proof that the winning poems were indeed better than mine. They never responded. I then wrote to the winner congratulating him and asked him if I could read his work. He didn't respond either. I gave up after that but I concluded that there was something fishy. The winner knew the organizer perhaps. Or maybe he his work was not original and he had fooled the judges.

Yesterday we (we were a team of 2) lost at a coding challenge at work. I wont go into the details of how I think it was unfair and how we deserved to win. That will defeat the purpose of this post. What really happened was we ran out of luck, my partner thinks it was because God was angry with her. After the contest I called a friend who on hearing the news said girls cant code anyway. I wanted to murder him. Today my manager tells me he was expecting us win. It hurts. As you might have guessed by now I am not good at this losing thing. In this case what also mattered was who I lost to. Last month I lost a promotion to the same guy who won y'day. If he wasn't a good friend I would have hated him. It is not validation that I need, I know exactly where I stand. But I guess I was using this contest as forum to prove myself and it hurts because I failed at that. This might just be a silly contest but thinking about how I have reacted to all major setbacks in my life, I do exactly the same thing. I cry foul, I sulk and I mope and then I spring back to normal. I don't have a problem about the sulking and moping but I guess the crying foul has to stop. I might be wise and responsible but I still have some growing up to do. And I need to put a leash on my ego before it goes out of hand. That or I need to win more often ;)

One thing off my list

I don't have a bucket list. Nothing that is documented at least. But yes there are a few things I want to do before I kick the bucket. One of the things on that list as I remember saying it to a friend was 'To give a good talk in front of an intelligent audience'. Last week I had the opportunity to do just that. It was a big event open for anyone to attend and it went ok. 'Ok' being not too good not too bad. The turn out was poor plus mine being the last talk people were losing interest, I had to rush through the presentation and hurry up. I hadn't really volunteered to do this and I hadn't done any of the hard work. It was a good opportunity that had come by, I just took it up.

Technically though, it was a good talk and even if there were very few people who attended I'd like to believe they were intelligent. So thats one thing off my list. Given the kind of inactivity this year has seen this also gives me something to blog about. So there.

Another chapter ends

Quick notes on happenings and my experience working out of a client location in the last 3 months.

1. I felt valued again after a long time.
2. My ego which had taken a beating got a nice boost.
3. Met some really cool and interesting people.
4. Figured out exactly the kind of work I want to do.
5. Was admired and I couldn't understand why.
6. Learnt that I can sit through a 3 hr journey within the city doing nothing.
7. Saw how a big international corporate giant works. Not sure I like it.
8. Realized eating alone sucks more that I thought it would.
9. Gained 3 kilos.
10. Lost an umbrella.
11. Realized people problems are everywhere.
12. Found a new role model.
13. Realized that documentation is not so bad.
14. My public speaking skills improved though it still needs a lot of work.
15. Wrote my first ever farewell mail.
16. Not a single person asked me why I wasn't married yet. (except my classmate from college who I met but he doesn't count.)
17. Bridget Jones Moments were only two, when I almost fell out of the bus and when my umbrella went flying during a conversation with the boss.

Sigh. Time to move on.

Fear Factor

Yesterday coming back from work there was this old guy (old compared to the otherwise young IT crowd) in the bus who mentioned there was some tension in the city. People got excited and there were frantic calls being made to learn more. The guy though wouldn't stop, I heard him make at least 15 calls calling different people warning them about the incident and with each call exaggerating a bit. So, he probably did a good thing by alerting people but I felt he was just creating panic. I called up a friend who works close by, he dismissed it saying the situation was under control and there was nothing to worry. This guy however, lets call him oldie, asked the driver to take a different route though the usual route hardly comes close to the affected area. He then made the driver switch on the radio to listen to the news, it wasn't even mentioned! After a lot of fidgeting and 'panic creating' he finally gave up realizing that the situation was probably under control. I heaved a sigh of relief and was about to go back to my music when oldie next made everyone in the bus close the windows. "Chinkungunya mosquitoes are coming in" he said. This after two giant mosquitoes had just bitten me. While his intentions were both good he was unnecessarily panicking and worse spreading the fear. And I could see he enjoyed it. Shows what an uninteresting life he otherwise has if this is how he derives joy. I spent the next one hour in the bus wondering how many days I'd have to take leave if I contracted the disease. Loser.

Travel blues and greens and yellows

So it takes 2hrs for me to get back home from work. On a bad day 2.5 hrs. About 1.5 hrs to reach work in the morning. Surprisingly I don't have as much problem with it as people (including me) thought I'd have. It doesn't bug me so much. Maybe because I was prepared, I knew it was only for a short duration and I am not really loaded at work. I also don't have to come home to screaming kids or a nagging husband and cook or do anything of that sort. So yeah, it turned out ok. What did surprise me though was that I didn't know the traveling would actually help me. For one it is a perfect ice breaker when talking to people. 'So how long did it take today?' , 'Were you stuck there?' I only have to start ranting about the traffic and next thing I know is I am discussing elections with a complete stranger. Second, I quite enjoy the sympathy I get from everybody. 'You come from so far? Really? Must be so tiring'. Third, I escape from work as early as 4:00 pm, only to shop at the factory outlets lined up near the place. No one objected, I live so far you see.

The only problem I have though is that at the end of the day I can't help feel that two precious hours of my day is lost doing nothing. I don't mind the travel in the morning, not being a morning person those hours don't count. I do exactly what I'd do otherwise: Sleep. Traveling back home, I've tried everything possible, I cant sleep, I cant read, I get bored of my playlist easily. With the crap that they play on radio, listening to it is not even an option. So all the two hours goes in daydreaming and introspection. Both of which are useless and unproductive.

I have one more month of traveling to do. I think I am going to miss the travel and the conversations after that. But I really hope in years to come traveling within the city becomes easy. Two hrs a day is not worth losing in commute.

Glue

Are you friends with someone because he/she is a good friend of your friend. You know, A knows B, and B knows C. So A knows C. A, B and C hang out together and have a good time though if B is not around A and C are just ok, not that great together. B is the glue.

I am glue to few small groups but most importantly I know many glues and hence know quite a few people through the glues. But off late I am been lying low. Not doing a good job as glue. And not keeping in touch with glues. My social circle is thinning rapidly and this is not good news. All this because I have not been blogging/gtalking/orkut-facebooking/phoning as much.

So why have I been lying low? No apparent reason. Just. The change that I was dreading turned out to be great. Excellent, in fact. I am now a firm believer of the age old saying change is good. More on it later.

Anyhoo are you glue? Or more of a glue-befriender?

Out of my comfort zone

I wish I hadn't made this post. Starting Monday I have to travel 20km (or more?) to work. I am going to be positive about this though knowing that my plan backfired does bother me....just a little bit. Politics at work if nothing is vary vary interesting.

In other news, I am 19 according to the voters list. Good it feels.


Coming soon 'How to make best of 4 hrs (or more?) of travelling a day'. Watch this space.

Team Lunch

Organizing lunch for a group of 30 is a stressful affair. There are people opposing the location, cuisine, the seating, the lighting and just about everything. But then they (the hungry ravenous souls ) eat like theres no tomorrow. Stress apart, I now have to explain the exceeded budget to the PTBs on Monday. Bah!

Law of Time vs Enthusiasm

The desire to do new and different things that interest you is inversely proportional to the spare time you have.

I am now relatively free at work and my enthusiasm levels to do anything have dropped to zero. Being 'available' on gtalk gives only momentary relief from the boredom. I have four posts drafted, will post them when I get busy again.

Postscript :
At the end of each post I face this arduous task of finding labels or tags that best suit the post. Believe me its not easy. There is no 'reuse'. I create different describing the same things (office, work???). I now realize there is no label for boredom. Which is impossible because so many of my posts are boredom inspired. The feature that I dearly welcomed in the new blogger is now turning into a pain in the you know where and the whole purpose is lost. Pah!

Tonty-Tonty

Thanks to the super-duper twenty20 finals, the hits to this blog have increased 10 fold mainly due to people who come looking for shirtless pics of the captain. Not that my blog has them but remember this? (Tip: Use image search, isay)

But what a match it was! Yes yes we all cheered and we'll talk about this for very many years but enough with the awards and cash prizes already. Not fair that I slog for 3 years, all I get is satisfaction while they win one tourney and make millions overnight. Coincidentally, tomorrow I get awarded (not in cash) for my work and all, satisfaction doubles. If only satisfaction could buy that Europe tour for me!

Travel times are here!

Istanbul's fate is my fate. I am attached to this city because it has made me who I am...

For me it has always been a city of ruins and of end-of-empire melancholy. I've spent my life either battling with this melancholy, or (like all Istanbullus) making it my own.

'Life can't be all that bad', I'd think from time to time. 'Whatever happens, I can always take a walk along the Bosphorus.'

Excerpts from Orhan Pamuk's Istanbul, Memories of a city.

This Saturday I am off to Istanbul, Turkey for two weeks on work. I hope I get to see a glimpse of the city, the people and the Bosphorus whose picture Pamuk has so beautifully painted. Will blog about it once I return!